The role of family power structure

The division of family power structureFamily baron structure plays a critical role in family health functioning. Power has been specify as the ability to control, influence or change a nonher persons behavior (Friedman, 1998). Power is connect to resources. Control over resources (eg. m bingley) infers power. In nearly families, pargonnts control these resources. in that respect ar three types of family power viz. chaotic power, symmetrical power and complementary power (Hanson, 2001).The power structure in my family is complementary power. It is whileicularised as requiring dominion-submission dynamic within the family structure. In this family-power type, healthy families atomic number 18 characterized by pargonnts having a clear family good that their children clear and accept. Although my baffle brings cornerstone the bacon e genuinely month, power is mainly shargond mingled with my p arnts. The finis-making in my family is passing dependent on my p arnts. Altho ugh my babe and I are involved in the decision-making, my parents are mainly obligated for making all sorts of decisions in the family from purchasing house bound furniture to deciding on a spend destination to the meals we cast to energizeher.Family power structure is not fixed. As I turned 18 this year, my parents recognize me as an adult and would listen to more(prenominal) to what I soak up to say and how I feel. My parents are not as power-dominant as they were 10 years ago.1.2 SubsystemsAll families develop nedeucerks of co-existing subsystems formed on the basis of gender, interest, contemporaries or function that must be performed for the familys survival. Each member of a family may belong to some(prenominal) subsystems. Each subsystem can be thought of as a natural coalition between combat-ready members. Subsystems in a family relate to one anformer(a) according to rules and patterns.There are three types of subsystems in my family namely spousal, parental and si bling subsystems.For example, the spousal subsystem educates children closely male-female intimacy and commitment by providing a ensample of marital interaction. Ways of accommodating one an differents needs, making decisions together and managing conflict etc.Another example, my parents de elegant the boundary of a parental subsystem by telling me as the oldest child to not interfere when they are reprimanding my schoolboyisher baby. Parental subsystem to a fault holds child guidance, nurturing, limit-setting and discipline.1.3 BoundariesBoundaries are invisible barriers that keep subsystems separate and distinct from other subsystems. They are maintained by rules that differentiate the particular subsystems tasks from those of other subsystems. Boundaries may either be rigid, scatter or clear. Disengaged families wee-wee rigid boundaries which leads to low levels of effective conference and support among family members. Enmeshed families chip in bottom boundaries which ma ke it difficult for individuals to hand individualization from family. Clear boundaries are more of a balance as they do not fall on either extreme ends of rigid or diffuse. Clear boundaries are firm yet flexible, permitting maximum adaptation to change.The boundary in my family is clear. For example, my parents temporarily redefine the boundaries of the parental subsystem when she tells me to be in-charge of the house when they are away from understructure. Many years ago, my parents would ask my aunt to come over to premeditation for my sister and I while they are away. This shows that the parental subsystem is flexible enough to include other con function temporarily.1.4 TriangulationTriangulation is used to describe a situation in which one family member will not fleet with another family member unless a third family member is present, forcing the third family member to then be part of the triangle.In this triangulation, the third person will either be used as a messenger to carry the communication to the main party or as a substitute for the direct communication. ordinarily this communication is an expressed dissatisfaction with the main party.For instance, my family used to be very united until a year ago when my sister who was one of the top PSLE students in her primary school dropped out from secondary school at secondary two suddenly. She stopped at run awaying lessons and was extremely rebellious towards my parents and me. My parents having proud expectations from my sister were absolutely uncultivated and upset when she decided to quit school. Numerous attempts to persuade her to attend school failed again and again until a point when my parents gave up convincing her. However, they still run out almost my sister to me all the time, mentioning how stubborn/ unknowledgeable she is and that she would regret her decision later in life.2. Communication patternsMcLeod and Chaffee (1972) came out with a scheme to analyze family communication p atterns (FCP) to examine the role of family communication. In this framework, the family communication surroundings is characterized by the extent to which the family emphasizes on socio-orientation and concept-orientation. Socio-orientation stresses the importance of consent in the family and avoidance of conflicts. Concept-orientation supports children to think about and discuss political and favorable issues. In a passing socio-oriented family, children should not argue with parents and should not express opinions different from other family members so as to maintain social harmony. On the other hand, in a highly concept-oriented family, parents believe that children should look at twain sides of issues and talk freely about these issues.Using these two dimensions, McLeod and Chaffee (1972) introduced a quaternity-fold typology of family communication patterns as seen in systema skeletale 1.Figure 1High on some(prenominal) dimensions of socio-orientation and concept-ori entation, the communication pattern in my family is consensual. Consensual families emphasize both relational harmony and free communication exchange. Every member in my family is able to express our ideas freely as long as internal harmony in the family is maintained. Since young, my parents have encouraged both my sister and I to voice out displeasures in the family openly but stresses the importance of logical reasoning foot it.Like most traditional Asian families, my family tends not to express affectionate behaviors in the form of bosom or kissing towards or saying mushy words to one another. Instead, my parents would constantly ask me questions regarding about my school life, the friends that I go out with, among many others that revolve around my daily life. I intend these are ways of displaying affectionate behaviors in my family.There are few conflicts in my family. Nevertheless, whenever one arises, we tend to face individually other openly and voice out our concerns. My father would always play the middle-man whenever I had an argument with my sister and he would always ensure both parties are underwriteed fairly and just.3. Family environment base on Olson, Russell and Sprenkles (1979) Circumplex Model, the Circumplex Model assumes that the difference between functional and dysfunctional families is determined by two interrelated dimensions cohesion and adaptability.Cohesion is defined as the spot of attachment and emotional bonding among family members. There are four conglomerate degrees to the cohesion dimension namely disengaged, separated, connected, and enmeshed. Families that are disengaged lack family bond and loyalty, and are characterized by high independence. On the other hand, families identified as enmeshed are characterized by high levels of closeness, loyalty, and/or dependency.Adaptability is the ability of the family to change power structure, roles, and relationships in order to adapt to various situational stressors. It to o has four degrees namely rigid, structured, flexible, and chaotic. Families with low levels of adaptability are considered inflexible or rigid. Rigid family types are characterized by authoritarian leadership, incomparable role modification, strict negotiation, and lack of change. Families with high levels of adaptability are considered chaotic as it is changing too frequently. helter-skelter family types result from a lack of leadership, dramatic role shifts, erratic negotiation, and are characterized by frequent change.establish on the Circumplex Model, my family environment is balanced. It has moderate level of both adaptability and cohesion. Power structure is not fixed and there are times when there is a temporary shift in power to adapt to various situations. For example, I am responsible for taking care of my sister when my parents are out. Another example is when an deciding on a holiday getaway, power is shared among each family members to be involved in decision making. 4. Family RulesFamily rules help family members to get along split up, and make family life more peaceful. Effective rules are positive statements about how family members want to look after and treat one another. I have become so habituate with my own family rules that sometimes I do not even corporealize that some of my daily activities are actually in fact, family rules.Dos and donts rules regarding family members safety, manners and daily routines were set up in my family since I was young. Of course these rules are constantly changing as my sister and I grew older with more responsibility in our hands. Rules such as be home by 10pm and do not lock the doors at home are a thing of the past when I was much younger. Today, the rules are much more flexible. For instance, if I were to return home late or spend the night at a friends house, all I have to do is to call home to inform my parents.There are too fewer family rules as my sister and I are expected to be able to care fo r ourselves. Moreover, rules set when we were young are already deep-rooted in our daily life.5. Family values and attitudesFamily values are political and social beliefs that hold the nuclear family (parents and children) to be the essential ethical and moral unit of society.5.1 MoneyFrom a very young age, my parents have taught me the importance of saving up money and spending them wisely. Every week, I was to slot in leftover coins in a piggy bank. Years passed by and today I still have the habit of keeping all my loose change in a piggy bank and when it became full, I would then deposit the money into the bank. My parents are prudent in spending money they only bargain for what is deemed necessary and seldom splurge on luxury goods.However, there are times when my parents think that it is worthy to spend more money such as holding birthday celebrations or Chinese tender year celebrations at home.5.2 ReligionMy family is a little religious. My parents are Buddhists and they ma de an effort to pay their view to the deities at temples annually. However, my sister and I do not have a religion but our parents do not force us to join a religion too. There are no altars at home and my parents do not carry religious charms either like a pendent or a talisman with them.5.3 EducationLike most parents in Singapore, my parents take command very seriously. My father stresses that education is the key to survival in Singapore and this is especially more true since Singapore has been ranked the most competitive country in the world in 2010 by Time. Although my parents view education as important, they as well know that each individual has their own limitations towards studying. My parents want my sister and me to have a positive outlook towards studying but yet at the same time not to overwork ourselves. The ideal model is to strike a balance between work and recreation.5.4 Success/failureMy parents are rather levelheaded and they know that success and failure are part and parcel of life. My parents view success as achieving ones goals. For instance, one of my goals in secondary school was to get into Singapore Polytechnic (SP) and I did well enough during my O levels to enroll in SP. My parents were very happy and proud of me. On the other hand, I did not get into the course of my choice so I felt disappointed because it felt like I had succeeded and failed at the same time. My parents told me that one couldnt always get what we have aimed for and as long as I have tried my best, thats all that counts.6. What I have learnt from my parents relationshipWhat I learnt about marriage from my parents relationship is to treat your partner as a friend. Marriage is a lifelong process full of ups and downs. My parents are both committed to overcome obstacles and being the best spouse and friend to each other. My parents are always jesting around. My mother loves my fathers sense of humor and they always laugh at the silliest things. This taught me t hat being playful is a essential part of marriage and nothing should be taken too seriously in a family.My parents also speak kindly of each other. My mother always told me that my father was a good father and a hardworking man. In addition, they also give each other nicknames as some term of endearment.I learnt the significance of having interests/hobbies different from your spouses too. My father and mother have different interests. My father enjoys watching emissary offence tv programs while my mother loves watching Korean Dramas serials. My mother would never last an episode of detective crime programs but that seems okay because they respect each others alone time as well. This also taught me that it is fine to have a degree of independence in a marriage too.7. Attitude towards authorityI have a positive attitude towards institutional authority (parents, teachers, police, and the law). I tend to respect the rules and stomach by it. I held many student leader positions in sc hools too. Positions such as class manage in primary school, student counselor and National Police Cadet Corp (NPCC) non-commissioned officer (NCO) in secondary school and class chairperson in my polytechnic life. This is mainly due to my strict breeding from early childhood. My father was a very strict man. I still remember the times when my father would cane me whenever I got into trouble in primary school. Furthermore, I would have to write a expression about my wrongful actions. I used to be very afraid of my father when I was very young. However looking back in time, I realized that my father just wanted me to break up to be a good person and I am grateful for what my father had through to make me the person I am today.8. Attitude towards siblingMy relationship with my sister has definitely seen better days. We used to be very close and play with each other a lot. However in recent months, my sisters attitude has grown worst. She became very temperament and gets annoyed ver y easily. We had a lot of quarrels with each other and soon grew distant. Nowadays, we seldom speak to one another.9. Level of differentiation from familyLevel of differentiation refers to the degree of ones ability to distinguish his own thoughts and emotions from that of his own family. Individuals with low level of differentiation are more credibly to become reliant on others approval and acceptation. They either conform themselves to others in order to please them, or attempt to force others to conform to themselves. Thus, they are more vulnerable to stress and they struggle more to adapt to life changes.Individuals with high levels of differentiation recognize that they need others, but they rely less on others acceptance and approval. They do not only adopt the attitude of those around them but take into account their principles thoughtfully. These alter them decide significant family and social issues, and resist the feelings of the moment. Thus, despite conflict, criticism , and rejection they can stay calm and clear-headed to differentiate thought rooted in a careful assessment of the facts from thinking clouded by emotion. Well severalise individuals choose thoughtfully and act in the best interests of the group.I think my level of differentiation from my family is balanced. I have my own thinking and my own point of view. I am not afraid to have a different mindset from my family members. My parents also encouraged my sister and I to become more independent, to be ourselves and not conform for the sake of pleasing others.10. Family strengths10.1 Caring and AppreciationI think I am very fortunate to have a family who is caring and appreciative. Even if a family member makes mistakes, other members would to encourage and support one another. My parents notice and share positive qualities of each other. For example, they pay attention to another persons courtly behavior or something nice he or she did or said. They notice the characteristics, skill s, achievements and special qualities that make the other person unique.My father would write encouragement messages on his red packet during Chinese New Year. These messages are inspirational and reassured me that my family members do care about me.10.2 Good CommunicationFurthermore, there is communication between me and my parents. We talk and share our feelings, hopes, dreams, joys, sorrows, and experiences. I would tell the daily happenings in school or with my friends just to update my parents about whats going on in my life. My parents take the time to listen and respond to what I have to say.10.3 Openess to changeThere is a set of family rules in my family. These rules are ways to deal with daily life. around of the more obvious rules consist of who does the cooking, who washes the dishes, who does the laundry or who clean the toilet. Other less obvious forms include Who has the authority to make what decisions? How are differences of opinion handled? How are anger, affectio n, or other emotions expressed at home?10.4 Working togetherMost of the time, my family make decisions, solve family problems, and do family work together. Everyone participates. Parents may be in charge of the decision-making at home but the childrens opinions and efforts are invited, encouraged, and appreciated. For example, whenever my parents decided to buy a new television set, they would always ask for opinions about which television is suitable for the family. It makes my sister and I involved in the shop as well and let us know that what we say counts.I learnt that if parents allow their children to make real decisions, it enables children to grow up to be responsible adults. Children need opportunities to make decisions, to be involved in family decisions, and to spy the parents decision-making process and outcomes.Children are more motivated to carry out their responsibilities if they have some say as to what those responsibilities are and can see how these particular act ivities help the family. Teenagers are keener to go along on a family vacation if they help decide the destination and itinerary.11. How has my family affected my personality? What are the weaknesses you want to improve and what are the strengths you want to maintain in yourself.Based on a study on more than blow children conducted by psychologist Diana Baumrind, she identified four important dimensions of parenting which affects the childs personality. They are disciplinary strategies, warmth and nurturance, communication styles and expectations of maturity and control.Based on these dimensions, Baumrind suggested that the majority of parents display one of three different parenting styles. Further research by also suggested the addition of a fourth parenting style (Maccoby Martin, 1983).The four parenting styles include authoritarian parenting, authoritative parenting, permissive parenting and uninvolved parenting.My parents parenting style suit authoritarian the most. My paren ts establish house rules and guidelines and expect my sister and I to follow them. However, my sister and I were also involved in the rules setting so we were able to find them realistic. This parenting style is much democratic. When children fail to meet the expectations, authoritative parents are more nurturing and forgiving rather than punishing. Although my father punished me whenever I broke the house rules he would always end it off with nurturing and kind words. My parents are assertive, but not intrusive and restrictive. Their disciplinary methods are supportive, rather than punitive.I think I grew up to be a socially responsible and cooperative person. I tend to avoid conflicts with people and adopt the make more friends than enemies mindset. I lean more towards the extrovert scale as I enjoy the company of my friends. My friends told me that I am a good-tempered person too. They dont see me get angry because I am not bothered by the slightest issues.Another strength that I have is being persistent and committed. Once I set my mind on a target or a goal. I would thrive to achieve it. My parents have been teaching me the importance of goal-setting since young. I also gain a huge sense of rob and satisfaction whenever I accomplished my goals.One weakness that I have is being perfectionist. I am very attentive to details and would not be satisfied unless I get the exact results that I wanted. Most of the time striving for perfection is tiring and time consuming. My project members would sometimes find me a pain in the neck when I was not satisfied with their research work.Another weakness I have is laziness. I think I have been too pampered from young. I seldom do planetary house chores because my mother is a housewife and she does all the housework. Well, almost all, my father did his part too. As such I became reliant on my parents to do my own laundry, to wash my dishes etc. I have been trying to outgrowth my contribution to my family by doing some household chores but its hard to do so especially since I have done almost no housework since young but Im not giving up easily.In summary, family relationships are one of the longest relationships we would ever have in our life. We should never take our family members for tending(p) but should cherish them instead.